Womanhood

I write to you for more reasons than one. First and foremost I hope life has treated you well.
I hope you’ve had the strength to get up every time you fell.
And I hope your mothers health is well
I can guarantee you, life won’t be as pleasant in hell

Its been 2 years since you and I crossed paths for the first and last time
Do you remember me at all?
It started as a night of good times
One for books
But I guess no matter the fun, a crook is a crook
1 drink, 2 drinks, 5 drinks, 6 drinks
The tunes are off the hook
And I don’t know if that was an earth quake or just my vision that shook

Next thing I know I’m asleep in a dark room
I hear your voice, a soft whisper but in my head it’s a boom
I’m fighting with all my might, yet unable to move
You had something to say, something to prove
And so you forced me to listen
You were hurtful, and ugly, and extremely rude
You were angry, dirty
You were unapologetic, brazen, and disgustingly crude

You ate me alive as if I was your plate of food
You entered my space as if it was yours to intrude
And I’ll never be the same because of you

I woke up the next morning, it couldn’t possibly be true
But there was pain and in my heart
As real as a bruise
My womanhood crumbled
As I realized the truth
You got the better of me and my soul held he proof
Jagged and broken,
Music became mute
Colors became dull
Smells became faint
Love become hate

I was angry and hurt
And I would do anything to make it stop
I found comfort in sex, and the sound of champagne pop
I was drowning in my misery with no want to stop
Looking for a solution
hoping to find it in the last drop
Bottle after bottle
Disappointment always made its way to the top

I was frustrated and lost with nowhere to turn to
And so I turned to the only thing I ever knew
I turned to the women who empowered me through and through
Every day reminding me:

“Kelly I am never giving up on you. You are beautiful and strong. Don’t you ever mistake your rights for his wrongs. You are loving and fruitful, you are resilient and truthful. You are proud, and smart and just look at what you do to people with your art. You can change the world with that heart, so don’t you dare fall apart. You need me and I need you. I’ve been here since the start. So don’t doubt that your sister will always have a place for you in her heart. You will get through this. You are a woman, did you forget? That we don’t quiver under life’s threats. That we float to the surface no matter how deep the depth. That we are unbreakable beyond measure and we can give life with just a breath. Did you forget sister, that you are powerful and deep, that you are worth so much more than any mans attempt to force you into defeat. Did you forget sister that your skin is tough, that when others speak down to you, you rise above. You’re stronger than you know but you have to want to grow, I can’t make you want it. But I’m here if you just want somebody to hold”

My sisters in solidarity, as they stand beside me, I couldn’t imagine a stronger army.

You may have thought that this was a battle that you won, but only a coward fights with a gun.
I bet you thought that you destroyed me that night, but I fight every day and I fight with all my might
I bet you thought I’d stay quiet, but watch my words as they begin to riot.

You had me for a second
But I got me for a lifetime
Not you or anyone else
Can take what is mine
My body, my soul, my peace of mind

Im blessed to be alive.
And I’m proud to say that I have survived.

 

K. Loopz
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One Comment Add yours

  1. mukul chand says:

    Great Post and picture too

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